They say, a home is not a place but it is a feeling. What if you decided to move out from your home? What will you going to do when your children interfere with your decisions? Would you force and drag them to your new house or wait until they’re okay with the plan? But, what if it will take years before they can decide that they’re fully-ready to move out? With the help of the terms used in Psychology, here are the factors that you can consider in order to help your kids ready themselves prior to moving out.
Consider residential mobility
In a study, it says that Residential mobility shapes both the experiences of individuals and the characteristics of neighborhoods. Understanding residential mobility in early childhood is important for contextualizing influences on child health and well-being. Why is it that this could affect in shaping your child’s well-being? The changes that your child will be going through can either be good or bad to them. Even though moving out often has a negative effect on the children, there are some things that could make it worthwhile. It still depends on you if you will going to take it in an optimistic way or not.
Get a location familiar to your Kids
There’s a theory that can support this factor, which is the Mere Exposure Theory. This theory explains that the more exposure the children have to a stimulus, they more they will tend to like it. If they’re already familiar with the place, there will be a possibility that they will agree with the decision you made with your spouse. For example, you just saw an old animated series that you’ve known before then you suddenly felt excited just by watching it. This is the reason why your child might feel like if they’re indifferent to the situation that will be happening soon. They’re not yet familiar with the place.
You might consider choosing the location of the house that is already familiar to them. For example, the house you’ve chosen is located near their school or their grandparents’ house. Through this, you decrease the probability of the hardships that they might go through the process of moving in a new place.
Avoid moving out if you have an adolescent kid
You should prioritize the stages that your kid is undergoing—physically, mentally, and emotionally. Your child’s transition period should be one of the vital things to be considered when moving out. If you missed this factor, there might be a possibility for them to struggle in terms of their identity, attention, and acceptance. Puberty stage is one of the crucial stages that your kid will encounter in his life and moving out can be a cause for deterring the social development of the child.
Your child should learn how to adjust on their own, with your proper guidance. Don’t force them to make friends with the children of your neighbors just because you want them to have a companion. Let them choose their friends. By doing this, you let them feel that you’re trusted with their decisions and will start opening up to you.
Strengthen your child’s sense of belongingness
Imagine being in a room where everyone’s already acquainted with each other except to you. What do you feel? You will feel like you’re out of place, right? Well, that’s exactly what your child might feel ones he goes to the playground but no one tries to talk to him because he’s not familiar with them. It’s better to help your child develop their sense of belongingness so that they may be able to prepare themselves from the rejections they might encounter later on when it comes to making friends. Let your child understand that if ever the other kids don’t want to be friends with them, they shouldn’t blame themselves for that. Explain to them that those kids might also be adjusting since your kid is also new to them.
Don’t disrupt friendships
They aren’t just your kids, they’re humans, too. They have feelings. Being away with the people they’ve been with since they were young is a tough decision they’ll make. It’s better to tell them about this idea months prior to moving out so that there will be enough time for them to prepare themselves most especially they will be departing with their friends.
Tell your kids that even though you’ve already moved out, they will still stay connected with their friends. Let them know that there are ways for them to keep in touch even though they’re far away from each other. You can also tell them that you can visit your old neighborhood once a month, depending on the availability but make sure that you’ll fulfill this promise.
Notice your child’s change in behavior
What are their initial reactions upon hearing the news? Are they happy about it or they gave you a vague reply? You should be able to identify what are the things that trouble them after knowing that the whole family will move out. If you feel that it doesn’t have an effect on them, it’s better to talk to them one by one. They might seem cool about the decision but you’ll never confirm your assumptions if you won’t ask them personally.
Give them options that are realistic enough to do. For example, you can let them stay inside your old house for a week or two so that they may be able to have their own time with the place that’s used to be their shelter. Another example is, you can also let them stay in your new house for a day, ask them the things they don’t like and tell them that you’ll find ways to fix that.
Know the suggestions of your kids
Are there any things they would like to say regarding the moving out? You should do the initiative of asking them if what their worries are during the move-out. Your kids should participate in the process. They might have suggestions that will help the entire moving out free of stress and trouble. Ask them if there are moving services they knew that can make the task easier for them. Let them decide the moving out date, but let them know if in what period will the move-out take place.
The most important thing to consider is not forcing your child to agree with every decision you will make. This situation might increase the chance that your kid might rebel against you if you don’t give them the chance to decide on their own. Let them take their time because, for them, it’s like they were being born again. The moving out can be a daunting experience to them when it comes to the social and emotional aspect. Try to understand where your child’s feelings are coming for you to be able to know how to deal with it.